Here is the bar miztvah service and speech of Bert Steinberg, an SHJ Board member who, at 75, has much of interest to say. The service serves as an example of a Humanistic Jewish bar mitzvah. Bert's service was officated by Rabbi Sherwin Wine. W. Hellman ...................................................................... From Mate1920@aol.comTue Nov 14 21:44:45 1995 Date: Sun, 5 Nov 1995 15:34:18 -0500 From: Mate1920@aol.com To: hj@teleport.com Subject: Adult Confirmation On Nov. 11, Rabbi Wine will officiate at my Adult Confirmation (Belated Bar Mitzvah) in Walnut Creek, CA. on the occasion of my 75th birthday. I have put together a text for the service (adapted from Sherwin's Celebration of Commitment Shabbat)which is about2200+ words (about 13K). After discussion with our list operator, Walter Hellman, he felt their would be interest by our subscribers in the above as well as my 2600 word (15K) extremely autobiographical talk. I am prepared to release the text of the Celebration at this time and am attaching that file. My talk will be made available to the list after Nov. 11 (inasmuch as several subscribers will be present I do not want to upstage myself). Walter also indicates that he will archive these files, which is fine with me. Let me say that, in my opinion, the text is extremely appropriate for any community celebration. As for my talk, please be prewarned as to its length -- but also as to the very personal nature of it. However, I do believe that the talk represents what might very well be a typical tale of the quintessential "unaffiliated Jew" of 69 years -- who only came to humanistic Judaism 6 years ago when I arrived in Northern California and found the Society of Humanistic Judaism. I know there are thousands of others "out there" who are just like me, but don't know of the Movement and that we exist. The specifics we have been discussing on the list are fine, and by all means should continue, but we do not have to agree on each and every "pilpel" if we are to develop into a still more accepted and meaningful part of Judaism and our Jewish community. So be pre-warned. Bert Steinberg Northern California SHJ P.S. If anyone is interested in the printed Service, please let me know and $1 to cover postage sent to 8 Valley High, Lafayette , CA 94549 would be appreciated. CONFIRMATION BERT WILLIAM STEINBERG November 11, 1995 Contra Costa Jewish Community Center Walnut Creek, California 94595 Welcome Rabbi Sherwin T. Wine (Birmingham Temple, Farmington Hills, Michigan) HEVENU SHALOM ALEICHEM Hevenu Shalom Aleichem Hevenu Sholem Aleichem Hevenu Sholem Aleichem Hevenu Shalom, Shalom, Shalom Aleichem Let there be peace. --Folk Song COMMITMENT Community is very important. Human nature resists aloneness. It prefers the company of other people. Belonging to a group, whether that group be a family, a congregation, a people, a nation, offers us advantages we cannot find in solitude. A good community reinforces our sense of personal self-esteem. It makes us feel wanted, important, and honest. It gives us people who share our convictions and ideals and who make us feel comfortable to speak freely. >From time to time, it is good for us to confirm our membership in the community to which we belong -- especially if we were born into the group and never had the chance to choose it on our own -- especially if we have come to the community from somewhere else and want to celebrate our attachment-- especially if we have studied the beliefs and principles of the group and want to renew our commitments. The community of humanistic Judaism is my community. It is also a special part of my personal identity. When members of our congregation have enriched their awareness of being humanistic Jews through study and reflection, it is very important to celebrate this new awareness. Confirmation belongs to no particular age or time of life. It does not stop at thirteen -- or at sixteen. It happens when we prepare for it and when we need it. HINNAY MA TOV Hin-nay ma tov oo-ma-na-eem She-vet a-heem gam ya-had. How good and how pleasant it is For brothers and sisters to celebrate together --Psalms JEWISH PEOPLE This evening we confirm our commitment to the Jewish people. The Jewish people is our extended family. It is the source of a compelling identity which we both inherit and choose. Although it can be in one land, the world is now its home. If we are part of the Jewish people, we have roots that go back 4,000 years. We have memories that embrace almost every historic age, almost every civilization. Not very much in human awareness has failed to touch the Jewish experience. If we are part of the Jewish people, we are the heirs to an old and powerful culture. Prose and poetry, music and dance, holidays and ceremonies emerged from our history and made us unique. Other nations shared our values, but our ancestors gave them a Jewish flavor. If we are part of the Jewish people, we feel humanism in the bones of our history. Our leaders told us the universe offers us justice and compassion, but our experience told us that destiny is often cruel and unfair. In the end, if there is going to be any justice or compassion, it must come from us. CONGREGATION RESPONSE We confirm our commitment to the value of Jewish identity and to the survival of the Jewish people. TUM BALALAIKA Shtayt a bokher un er trakht A young lad stood and thought Trakht un trakht a gantse nakht Thought and thought all night Vemen tsu nemen, un nit farshemen. Which to marry and not shame? Vemen tsounemen, un nit farshemen. Which to marry and not shame? Tum bala, tum bala, tum balalaika Tum bala, tum bala, tum balalaika Tum balkalaika, shpeel balalaika Play the balalaika, and be happy. Tum balalaika, fraylakh zol zein. Meydl, meydl,'kh vil bay dir fregn: Maiden, maiden,I want to ask you Vos ken vaksn, vaksn on regn? What can grow without rain? Vos ken brenen un nisht oyfhern? What can burn and never burn out? Vos ken benken, veynen on trern? What can cry and shed no tears? Narisher bokher, vos darftsu fregn? Silly boy,what kind of a question? A steyn ken vaksn, vaksn on regn; A stone can grow without rain Libe ken brenen, un nisht oyfhern, Love can burn and never burn out A hartz ken benken, veynen on trern. A heart can cry without any tears. - - Folk Song HUMANISM This evening we confirm our commitment to humanism. Humanism is the way we see ourselves and the world we live in. It is the way we see our own power and our place in the order of things. If we are humanists, we do not dwell on our weakness and our helplessness. We do not linger on our fears and anxieties. We are careful to remember that our limitations can become our excuses. If we think about them too often, we tend to exaggerate them. We become too timid for happiness. If we are humanists, we start with our limitations, but we do not stop there. We move on to the power we have to improve our lives. We know that we can know more than we know. We know that we can do more than we do. Our mistakes are matched by our talents. Our anxieties are confronted by our strength. If we are humanists, we recognize that life has more possibilities than our fears will allow. We do not indulge our fear. We resist it. CONGREGATION RESPONSE We confirm our commitment to humanism. BASHANA HABAA Ba-sha-na ha-ba-a, ne-shev al ha-mior-pe-set V'nis-por tsi-po-rim no-o'dot Ye-la-dim b'chuf-sha y'sa-cha-ku to-fe-set Bain ha-ba-yit oo-vain ha-sa-dot Od ti-reh, od ti-reh, ka-ma tov yi-hi-yeh Ba-sha-na, ba-sha-na ha-ba-a Soon the day will arrive when we will be together, And no longer will we live in fear. And the children will smile witjhout wondering whether On that day no dark clouds will appear. Wait and see, wait and see, What a world there can be, If we share, if we care, you and me (repeat chorus) HUMANITY This evening we confirm our commitment to all humanity. The human race is also our extended family. More than any piece of land, more than any natural environment, humanity is our home. Endowed with self-awareness, reason, and hope, we stand separate from all other creatures, bound together by our own uniqueness. If we confirm our human identity, we confirm the reality of human nature. Although each individual is unique, although each culture is special, there is a common humanity that defines us all. Love and anger, compassion and hate, reason and intuition are not the possession of any one people. They belong to us all and build the human condition we share. If we confirm our human identity, we confirm our power to cross the boundaries of family, race, and nation to identify with the humanness of people beyond. Our human connection does not diminish the value of our individuality or the importance of our Jewishness. It enriches them and gives them an appropriate setting, a context where the similarities are far more important than the differences. CONGREGATION RESPONSE We confirm our commitment to the unity of all people. LO YISA GOY Lo yi-sa goy el goy che-rev Lo yil-ma-doo od mil-cha-ma. ( Repeat) For everyone 'neath vine and fig tree, Shall live in peace and unafraid. (Repeat) And into plough shares beat their swords Nation shall learn war no more. (Repeat) --Isaiah DIGNITY This evening we confirm our commitment to human dignity. Dignity is a human need, like survival and pleasure. It is also a human value which stands above all other values. It is the moral guide of our life. If we pursue dignity we do not hide from the reality of our own freedom. We do not run away from our own responsibility. We know that no one else can make our decisions for us, and that, in the end, we always consent to what we do. If we pursue our dignity, we seek to become the masters of our own lives. We do not embrace pleasure when it makes us more dependent. We do not avoid pain when it makes us more independent. Self-reliance is a virtue, even it is difficult to achieve. If we pursue our dignity, we do not strive to become the humble servants of any authority. We will not bow our heads in worship. But we will extend our hands in friendship. CONGREGATION RESPONSE We confirm our commitment to human dignity, both our own and that of others. OUT OF THE NIGHT Out of the night that covers me, Black as the pit from pole to pole, I thank whatever gods may be For my unconquerable soul. In the fell clutch of circumstance I have not winced nor cried aloud. Under the bludgeonings of chance My head is bloody but unbowed. Beyond this place of wrath and tears Looms but the horror of the shade, And yet the menace of the years Finds, and shall find me, unafraid. It matter not how strait the gate, How charged with punishments the scroll, I am the master of my fate I am the captain of my soul. --William Ernest Henley COMMUNITY This evening we confirm our commitment to our community. Our community is more than a building. It is more than a congregation. It is our extended family. It is our humanistic Jewish home where we can celebrate the identities we feel so strongly, where we can work together to help each other, where we can make our friendship grow. If we are part of our community we know that we do not stand alone. Other people share our thoughts and feelings. Other people share our beliefs and convictions. In a world that does not share our point of view, there is a comfort in togetherness. Solidarity is a welcome pleasure. If we are part of our community we know that we are better together than we are alone. In solitude we cannot discover who we are and what we do. Only the stimulus of other people who prod us through friendship, challenge and shared work can awaken us to our potential. We are social beings made more real by the presence and love of others. CONGREGATION RESPONSE We confirm our commitment to the welfare of our community. AYFO OREE Ay-fo o-ree? O-ree bee. Ay-fo tik-va-tee? Tik-va-tee bee. Ay-fo ko-khee? Ko-khee bee. V'-gam Bakh. CONGREGATION Where is my light? My light is in me. Where is my hope. My hope is in me. Where is my strength? My strength is in me. And in you. -Rabbi Sherwin T. Wine MEMORIAL This evening we confirm our gratitude to the heroes of the past. The heroes of our past are the human roots of our present commitments. They are the many Jews who valued their power, their responsibility, and their identity. They are the numberless non-Jews who bequeathed their thoughts and deeds to the progress of humanity. If we truly confirm our roots, we do not do so slavishly. The past is not well served when it is worshiped. Our heroes were neither gods nor saints. They were eminently human, striving to reach goals they often never reached. Their legacy, like all legacies, is an imperfect wisdom. Just as they took their past and changed it for the better, so must we do the same with our own heritage. If we truly confirm our roots, we do not do so pretentiously. Not all of our heroes were famous men and women. Not all of them wrote books and became the leaders of noble causes. Many of them were patient workers and loyal followers. Many of them were caring ancestors who spoke their humanism more through their deeds than through their words. Many of them were family and friends who, day by day, undramatically, revealed the truth through example -- and how proud I am to remember and number my father among them. If he could only have been part of this celebration......... CONGREGATION RESPONSE We confirm our commitment to the heroes of our past, and to the better world which they strove to achieve. NAASEH SHALOM Na-a-seh shalom b'o-lam, na-a-seh shalom a-lay-nu V'al kal ha-o-lam, V''im roo eem-roo shalom. Na-a-seh shal-om, na-a-seh shalom, Shalom a-ley nu ,v'al kol Yisrael, Na-a-seh shalom, na'a-se shalom, Shalom a-lay nu, v'al kol ha-o-lam. (Repeat) (May peace prevail for us, for Israel, and for all the world) -- Siddur (Adapted) INTRODUCTION OF BERT STEINBERG Rabbi Sherwin T. Wine BERT STEINBERG ADDRESS -- "A Journey..........." RESPONSE -- RABBI WINE CANDLELIGHTING Baruch ha-or ba-olam Radiant is the light of the world Baruch ha-or ba-adam Radiant is the light within people Baruch ha-or ba-yom tov Radiant is the light of the holiday Lucie Brandon Jesse & Daniel Behar-Goldsmith Lillian & Jack Olshansky David Steinberg & Helen Behar Elizabeth Cohen Dylan Steinberg & Amey Hutchins Judy & Irving BennettSophie & Bert Steinberg SHALOM CHAVERIM Shalom cha-ve-rim, shalom cha-ve-rim, Shalom, shalom, L'hit-ra-ot, l'hit ra-ot, Shalom, shalom (Farewell friends, till we meet again) --Traditional Celebration written by Rabbi Sherwin T. Wine Graphics design and production by Bert Steinberg ....................................................................... From Mate1920@aol.comTue Nov 14 21:44:08 1995 Date: Mon, 13 Nov 1995 11:53:39 -0500 From: Mate1920@aol.com To: hj@teleport.com Subject: Adult Bar Mitzvah (long) The following is the talk I gave at my Adult Confirmation on the occasion of my 75th birthday. Prewarned -- it is long (about 15K), is extremely autobiographical -- but its value for the list (in my personal, maybe egotistical, opinion) I feel it is the story of the quintessential unaffiliated Jew. There are 1.5 million of them out there -- if we could only reach them all............. BERT STEINBERG BAR MITZVAH TALK -- NOVEMBER 11, 1995 Well -- My thanks to our wonderful chorus, and its leader, Maria Keleman Solis, for their inspirational singing; to Rabbi Wine for volunteering to indulge me in my somewhat unique undertaking; and to each of you for being here tonite -- my sincere appreciation. My ego would like me to believe that your motivation had something to do with me -- but my better sense cautions me that you are looking for answers to two questions which probably came to mind when you heard from us. First, what is an adult confirmation, and a secular humanist one yet? Your curiosity may very well have been peaked. And second, why now, at 75? The answers will be apparent, I hope, in the next not so few minutes. And to truly appreciate tonite and what it stands for I must take you on a journey, a long one, which starts more than 75 years ago when a lad in his teens, like so many others, was part of the mass emigration to the guldener medina, America. My father went to work in a New York shop as a button hole maker, joined the Amalgamated Clothing Workers Union, became an organizer and business agent, and when he didn't like the sweetheart deals its leader, Hollander, was making with the shopowners, left the union to protect his physical well-being. He became a grocer and it wasn't long before he formed a retailers association -- in an attempt to get all the stores, which opened at 6 in the morning, to close at 8 p.m. instead of 10 p.m. so that maybe they could spend a couple of hours with their families and kids before the children went to bed. During this same time, he and his lantsmen in the Arbeter Ring, the Workmen's Circle, became unhappy with their socialist politics so they quit and organized their own, the Jewish Peoples Fraternal Order, part of the International Workers Order. All their meetings were conducted in Yiddish and I was present at most of them. My father cared about people and what happened to them. Much of his scarce free time was spent working for the betterment of mankind. Pragmatist that he was he could not accept the two-faced, hypocritical manner of organized religion, and that orientation was passed on to me. He also taught me the meaning of fairness, of ethics and morality in my dealings with my fellow man, without any idea that these standards originated thousands of years before in a great book, the Torah. At his funeral in 1970, in my eulogy (I couldn't permit a rabbi who never knew him to extol his virtues) I called him a people's person. And so he was, and so the journey continues......... The IWO sponsored Camp Kinderland on Sylvan Lake in Hopewell Junction , N.Y. My Yiddish and Jewish experience continued there. My summers, from ages 7 to 15, were spent in that camp -- I learned about Biro Bidjan, the Jewish settlement in the Soviet Union, we had projects about the Jewish writers, poets and Sunday mornings we marched to the flag pole in our white shirts and red bandanas, and sang the Internationale -- in Yiddish. We also learned that religion was the opiate of the masses The rest of the year,it was the IWO sponsored Yiddish schools -- not Cheders -- but shules that taught us to read, write and speak Yiddish, schools which presented a rich cultural environment for Yiddish thought. The best thing about the school I went to, was the fact that a cute, 12 year old meydl, who came from the same family background as I did, also attended. It was a long walk home from school which left plenty of time for talking, but never enough, so I remained on her stoop until my mother started wondering where I was. On our first real date, Sophie insisted on paying her own nickel into the Saturday matinee to see Richard Dix and "Stingaree" was the movie. I don't remember the name of the Chapter that week. But the relationship stuck, and 63 years later Sophie and I will be celebrating our 55th anniversary next month. Back to the journey....... I went on to Mitl Shul, but when I was 15, things Jewish changed. College took precedence, there was work after school, then graduation and six months later Sophie and I were married. Yiddishkeit-speaking, though, it was the beginning of some 40 years or so of drifting, not unlike our ancestors thousands of years before, but this desert was New York City. Today we have two new buzz words -- "Jewish continuity" and "Unaffiliated Jew." Let me tell you something about the quintessential unaffiliated Jew. After I left Mitl Shul at 15, in all of the ensuing years we knew we were Jewish. At all family gatherings we sang all the old Yiddish songs -- Tum Balalaika, Offen Pripitchek, mixed in with Joe Hill and Solidarity Forever, -- we went to Yiddish concerts and lectures, we were Jewish -- but never in all those years were we affiliated with any Jewish organization -- mainstream or not. Unaffiliated Jews! Indeed Sophie and I were. We come to another way station on the journey..... the year 1985. The place, the Pocono Mountains where we had a second home which we used week-ends. One summer afternoon, friends invited us over for some drinks and to meet a newcomer to the community, their periodontist from New York. Gloria Scott, who is here tonite - she's another East Bay transplant from New York-- will surely remember that day when we met Sigmund Stahl and his wife, Bonnie. Some time later, after learning that Signmund's real passion was biblical study, and a marvelous teacher he was, Gloria, her husband , Sophie and I started talking about how inadequate we felt in our knowledge of our roots and our Jewish historical background. It didn't take long before Sigmund was leading sessions every other week-end when we were in Milford. We studied the Torah, line by line, pilpel by pilpel, and it was fascinating. The little chavarah grew until it was necessary to say "No" to others who wanted to join -- all of them being what today we would call, unaffiliated Jews, all thirsting for more knowledge of their history and their civilization. Almost 5 years later when Sophie and I migrated to Contra Costa that group was still going strong. The important thing, though, is that I constantly complained to Sigmund (who was a believer) that the more I studied the Torah, the more he was convincing me that it could not have come from God. His response, wonderful person that he was, "It doesn't matter, Bert. The more you understand the book, the more you will understand about being Jewish." I didn't appreciate the value of that until years later. One day Sigmund arranged an ecumenical panel in the community -- and surprise of surprises -- he asked me to join the panel. I reminded him of my non-theistic feelings, but that didn't matter. To have you understand where I was, how I felt, and what made me tick 7-8 years ago, before I knew of any SHJ, I want to read part of my panel presentation : So here goes: The last time I remember being in a synagogue was 65 years ago -- and I was doing my grandmother a great favor at the time, but, I AM A JEW! I was not Bar Mitzvahed -- nor was my son -- but, I AM A JEW ! I cannot read Hebrew -- nor speak it -- but, I AM A JEW ! My father was not only non-religious, he was anti-religion -- an atheist -- but he was, and I AM, A JEW ! My father was a Yiddishist. He knew and studied the language. With no formal education he, and his friends, would gather to read each other's Yiddish poems and meises (stories), and would recite and perform them to their landsmanshaft groups. It was a living language -- the language of the people -- and we were people persons. Plays from the ARTEF (Arbiter's Teatre Farband), the Yiddish Group Theatre of the 30's and 40's and evenings with the IKUF (Internationaler Kultur Farband) still are vivid memories. What does being a Jew represent for me? It means being able to qvell when I listen to a Theodore Bikel or a Ruth Rubin sing those lilting, haunting lullabies and folk songs. Being a Jew means savoring an Isaac Beshavis Singer story or novel, appreciating Sholom Aleichem, I. L. Peretz, Nachem Weissman, or the many other literary greats. Being a Jew means understanding the problems of all persecuted religions and races -- and helping them to achieve their rightful place in the sun. And I suggest to one and all -- that one can be a Jew -- a good Jew -- whether or not he/she accepts the written record purported to have come from a supreme being. In summary, I AM A JEW, I said -- one who seeks to understand his ethnic and cultural background, which through many generations has developed a rich heritage of tradition, music, literature and its own special uniqueness -- none of which need depend on religion or any other artificial bonding. That was how I felt then, long before Sophie and I moved into our Lafayette home 6 years ago this weekend -- unaffiliated, but very much a Jew-- And now we come to the major junction stop on our journey.... Two months earlier, on Labor Day weekend, we were here to arrange for the arrival of our furniture and whatever else was needed in this major move we were involved in. The Contra Costa Times ran an article about a Jewish Newcomers Fair at the CCJCC. So why not go over and see what was doing locally? We walked into the auditorium, and were flabbergasted at the almost 50 tables , representing every Jewish organization, of any kind, that was in the area. The Jewish food tables rimmed the hall and Sophie and I wandered about separately. All of a sudden, Sophie called me over to a table in the middle of the hall--and there was a beleaguered Lucie Brandon representing the Society for Humanistic Judaism with literature galore. We looked at it, said it sounds like us allright, took the material home to read which included a membership application, talked with Lucie a bit, and went on. We then meandered into the Library, this very room--and were met with open arms by a Senior volunteer, Elizabeth Cohen, who told us something about the Center and introduced us to Lil and Jack Olshansky. The warmth of these wonderful people, and the others we met made a deep impression. When you move into a new community you need to make new friends and meet new people, so we joined the Center. Nina Siegel spotted us and we gave her $5 and joined Chevra Chai as well. From New York a week or so later, we mailed the signed SHJ membership application to Roy Calder. That Labor Day represented the crowning stop in the journey I am relating. That day represented a change in our lives -- not only that we are now more Jewish than we have ever been -- I always knew I was a Jew, but now being Jewish had a special meaning. That day, I can now look back and say, I found religion. That day started something which grew as my understanding grew. No longer was I just a Jew. No longer was I unaffiliated. No longer was I detached from the rest of the Jewish community. That day I started to become a Jew with a definition, a Jew with a purpose, a Jew with understanding, a Jew with a religion, I was a secular humanistic Jew. That brings me to the Center -- this Jew who always identified a Center as an arm of the mainstream, organized Jewish community. To my most pleasant surprise, as we became more involved with the daily life of this Center I realized that (with the usual several exceptions) the people here were more accepting of diverse attitudes. A major precept of humanistic Judaism is the concept of a pluralistic Jewish community -- one which will accept anyone who is willing to be a Jew and live life in the Jewish tradition. I have the greatest respect for anyone who wants to follow a Jewish philosophy -- what ever philoophy is comfortable for that individual. All I seek in return, is a respect for my feelings and for my right to practice my philosophy. The journey has taken us to today, and the first two questions -- What is an adult confirmation and why at age 75? The why 75 is easy -- Remember Hillel," if not now, when?" Today represents, for me, a confirmation of my place in the totality of the Jewish experience, which started thousands of years ago, and will continue for thousands of years to come. If........... And that is such a big if........... I said earlier that I found religion in the secular humanistic Movement. It made a believer of a non-believer. That is so true, and I am so grateful for its presence. You know there is no greater passion than exists in a convert. I have a T shirt which says it all -- I YELL BECAUSE I CARE. And that is so true. But I also have regrets. My greatest regret is that Rabbi Wine was not born 30 or 40 years earlier -- and that I spent most of my adult life, while we were raising our family, without having known of the existence of the secular humanistic Movement, and that there was not a branch of that Movement in New York. Had there been, my father would have been in the thick of it. Had there been, the home I was raised in would have been more connected to the Jewish community, its people and its civilization. Had there been, Sophie's and my home would have had a different aura and ambience. Had there been --- maybe, just maybe,--- my son would not be lacking in his identity with Jewish culture. And had there been---- maybe, just maybe,---- his son would have found the right meaning and have been comfortable as a Jew. Just maybe. My son and grandson are wonderful men -- caring, loving, compass-ionate human beings -- aware of their responsibilities to their fellow men and women --They are true citizens of the world, but lost to the tribe. If we, in the past, had been less parochial, and more pluralistic, maybe, just maybe, we would not have to worry so much about today's unaffiliated and the disaffiliated. Maybe as I learned in my studies for tonite, the many contributions the Jews have made to the other religions of the world would be understood and appreciated by all. You know the Sabbath, the ethical and moral values in one's relationship with other human beings, our system of jurisprudence, even the idea of a single God if that's your orientation, these are Jewish ideals -- and we have to be proud of our philosophers, teachers and theorists who developed them. And so the journey comes to an end -- or is it really the start of a new journey? Because I recognize that there are 1.5 million unaffiliated and disaffiliated Jews in this country, because of the concern about intercultural marriages and the effect on Jewish continuity, because the Jewish community must understand and realize what these unaffiliated Jews want and need, and that because maybe, just maybe, we humanistic Jews are one of the answers, I must make this kind of Statement tonight and confirm my commitment to my heritage and to the Jewish people . My final plea to you : Please do not judge me by what I am not, but rather, judge me by what I am. And finally, finally -- I will ask you to indulge me --cornball that I am--for 4 more minutes -- while we listen to a favorite of mine--my life's theme song . (Tape of Sinatra's "My Way")