Here are two pieces written by Jane Goldhamer on starting up a group.
Jane is the founder of the Humanistic Jews of Greater Portland (Oregon,
U.S.A.) and a board member of the Society for Humanistic Judaism.


From goldhamr@teleport.comWed Jan 10 19:56:27 1996
Date: Thu, 30 Nov 1995 12:54:50 -0800 (PST)
From: "M. Michael Goldhamer" <goldhamr@teleport.com>
To: hj@teleport.com
Subject: HJ/ Roger Eden's post of 11-25-95

     I could feel Roger's discouragement about starting a hj organization 
very well, having been very low in the first 15 or so months of trying to 
rub sticks together and get a spark going here.
     After I was talked into making the effort, the national office sent 
me a printout of everyone in Oregon who had ever made an inquiry to SHJ.  
I picked out the 27 who were in or near Portland, added some people I 
knew who might be interested, and sent a letter suggesting that we meet 
to talk about forming a group.  Thirty people came to the first meeting 
in April 1992, five of whom are members of the community that finally 
formed.  (Actually there are 7 from the beginning; two came to the first 
meeting without their spouses.)
     For the rest of 1992 and about half of 1993 we lurched along with no 
organization, no committees, no income, and no name, coming up with the 
next month's program at each monthly meeting.  We did manage to have a 
1992 Rosh Hashana service with major help from a madrikha in Washington 
state; also a Hanukka party in December '92 and a Seder in the spring of 
1993--plus some Shabbat potlucks, discussion programs, and a picnic.
     In October 1992 I hoped that there would be enough willing people to 
become organized, called a meeting to talk about it, and almost no one 
came.  What I discovered in these months was that we attracted a lot of 
unlikely candidates for members:
     a. People who are opposed on principle to joining any organization 
(that's one of the reasons they're unaffiliated).
     b. People who aren't satisfied with anything; nothing "meets their 
needs" (another reason they're unaffiliated).
     c. People who are short on social skills such as cooperation (a 
third reason).
     d. PEople who like to window shop--they're curious, but not terribly 
interested.
     e. People who are somewhat interested but too busy with other things.
     f. People who'd probably join IF the organization were up and 
running already, but who don't want to go to all the trouble of trying to 
get it started.
     During this phase, it takes at least one person who's willing and 
able to keep something going, without much help.
     Maybe you saw my reflections on the Colloquium, in which I stated 
the belief that we're unlikely ever to have really large communities 
because the majority of people are lukewarm or disinterested with regard 
to religion.  A small number truly believe and a small number care about 
what, if anything, they CAN believe.  For the lukewarm, the question 
isn't important enough to think much about, let alone make an effort to 
get an organization going.
     In the fall of 1993, however, we finally had attracted a few people 
who were enthusiastically interested and whose enthusiasm was 
communicated to a few more who were willing to go along.  We needed a 
"minyan" of 10 member units to affiliate with SHJ, and we got that number 
through some gentle persuasion.  Success breeds success, and two years 
later we have 36 member units who are pretty much committed to what we're 
doing; plus a few people who "never join anything" but are quite involved 
in our activities, and others who subscribe to the newsletter and show up 
now and then or not at all.
     Publicity has played a part.  Notices of events in the Jewish and 
city newspapers bring some telephone inquiries and some attendance, and 
sometimes someone comes to something and likes us.  We've had a few 
feature articles that have elicited calls.  (I never feel that a call is 
not worthwhile, since it gives an opportunity to tell what we're about, 
even if the caller concludes we're not for her/him.)  The big volume of 
inquiries comes preceding Passover and the High Holidays, when many Jews 
suddenly remember they're Jews and want to do something about it.  We do 
quite wonderful services for these occasions, and impress new people.  We 
take care to be visible as a legitimate component of the Portland Jewish 
community, with representatives to inter-synagogue boards and committees, 
etc.  We also stress that we aren't interested in competing or 
proselytizing--we offer another approach for those Jews who haven't found 
a comfortable niche for themselves in other Jewish religious groups, and 
we're happy to refer people who approach us to the other groups, if 
that's where they'd be more comfortable.  Word of mouth helps as 
publicity, too.  Members tell friends about us.
     When someone asks for information we send descriptive material 
(history, philosophy, organization, activities, etc. for SHJ and our 
local group) plus 3 complimentary monthly newsletters. After the 3rd free 
newsletter, the recipient is asked to become a newsletter subscriber or a 
group member.  Many don't (and are dropped from mailing), but at least 
they know about us and can tell others, perhaps.
     Last spring we got started with children's education for ages 4-8, 
and have 12 children in the program.  It's a small start, but now if 
someone asks what we have for children, we have something to tell 
him/her.  We've had one Bar Mitzvah and are willing to help put together 
more of them.  Though the occasions haven't yet arisen, we're also 
prepared to be prepared to offer "adoption" ceremonies, adult B'nai 
Mitzvot, baby-naming, weddings, or memorial services.
     The monthly newsletter seems to play a somewhat important role.  Not 
only does it tell about local HJ activities and report on things going on 
in the area and in the larger HJ movement, but also has a personal touch 
which people say they like. We always mention birthdays of the month and, 
if it becomes known, other news of members such as honors, publications, 
kid news, family weddings or babies, hospitalizations, family deaths, 
etc.  A poem or a short essay by a member may be printed.  Contributions 
are acknowledged.  Sometimes a joke or cartoon is included in the 
newsletter.  I often write personal notes: e.g. if someone is mentioned 
as having helped with an event, I might write "thanks!" in the margin.  
     When we have meetings we include candle lighting in which anyone who 
wants to share a joy or a concern can light a candle and tell about it
     Anything you can do to help people "bond" to one another and feel 
like a close community may be the most productive effort of all.  Other 
things flow from that, and producing successful programs adds to the 
feeling of community and the upbeat spirit which makes group 
participation a positive experience.  Listening to people's complaints, 
concerns, ideas, and contributions, in an AFFIRMING way, is also vital.
     Hope this is some help.  Good luck!!

Jane Goldhamer, coordinator
Humanistic Jews of Greater Portland
.......................................................................


From goldhamr@teleport.com Thu Jun 18 21:06:11 1998
Date: Wed, 17 Jun 1998 10:53:19 -0700 (PDT)
From: "M. Michael/Jane Goldhamer" <goldhamr@teleport.com>
Reply-To: hj@teleport.com
To: roger@banqair.co.uk
Cc: Humanistic Judaism <hj@teleport.com>
Subject: HJ/ Why the questions?

Dear Roger,
	Like Eddie (nice to hear from you again, Eddie, and I'm sorry to
hear that you've been having problems in France), I may not be qualified
to talk about the situation in Great Britain, but I have a few general
observations.
	1)We are not failures because there are thousands of secular Jews
and we are only able to attract hundreds.  Here in the U.S., S/HJ is not
booming, either.  Of the 28 SHJ affiliates in North America, only 5 have
more than 100 member households, and they include the 2 congregations with
a rabbi and a building and 1 at a huge retirement-living complex with a
high Jewish residency.  It takes a lot of time, effort and patience to get
a S/HJ community going, and some don't make it.  
	2) Of all the secular Jews, probably most aren't at all concerned
with the question of religious belief.  Many of them belong to
conventional synagogues because it's conventional, their families/friends
belong, there's an up-and-running program for children, they enjoy going a
couple of times a year because it's comfortably familiar and makes them
feel Jewish, etc.  They aren't concerned with whether they believe what
they're saying in those services: they just don't think about it, it's not
an important issue to them.  Others who never go to a synagogue find their
Jewish needs are met by membership in other Jewish organizations, social,
philanthropic, etc. They don't have any need or desire to engage in the
"religious" part.  And then there are the ones who don't identify as Jews
by any involvement of any kind.  If asked, they'll say they're Jewish, but
don't act on it.  None of the above are going to want to put their effort
into building and maintaining a movement for people who really care about
saying what they believe and believing what they say.
	3) I suspect that it may almost be the kiss of death to try to
push people into organizing.  Most will turn and run in the opposite
direction. My suggestion to anyone trying to get a S/HJ group started is
to find a few interested people and start slowly, with activities that are
proven winners.  Don't suggest becoming a formal organization; suggest
getting together to plan a Humanistic Seder.  Or a quiet, informal Yom
Kippur afternoon in someone's living room.  Or a Purim party or a Hanukka
party (especially if there are people with children).  There are in
existence some emotive, inspiring, and very Jewish-feeling services for
the High Holidays, and Passover Haggadot.  (I could send you copies of
ours, if you want.)  These can always be tinkered with to suit the tastes
of the users, of course.  I think it takes a while, some experiences of
working together on a common goal and pulling it off, before people get to
feel that they know each other, trust one another, feel as if they're
friends, are having fun together, and are then ready to contemplate
becoming a formal organization.
	4)The group that's ready to become a formal organization also
needs to be one that's working on a common agenda. What S/HJ is about
needs to be clear from the beginning.  Since we attract people who are
searching for something different, we attract some people with other
visions of their own, some ready to go to work to form an organization in
line with their vision.  An attempt to meet the desires/interests of
everyone who comes around is obviously futile.  Even though you're
interested in numbers, the folks who are looking for other directions must
understand what we are; eventually they'll look elsewhere, and that's
okay--especially if they're treated nicely as we discourage and bid them
goodbye!
	5) A going operation is like a marriage: there will be differences
of opinion, hurt feelings, anger and resentment that arise from time to
time, as well as some lovely times.  Patience and forbearance and
willingness to listen to each other, compromise, and forgive are always
necessary!
	All of the above may be what you already know and have been
through; if so, I apologize.  Just wanted to say that I'm in sympathy with
your discouragement and frustration.  As for Miriam's post, I think her
tone of voice would have made her message seem more friendly if it had
been spoken instead of written.  The Society for Humanistic Judaism and
the Congress of Secular Jewish Organizations both have lots of material
and lots of experience, developed over years, that are very helpful and
that address issues that have been brought up on this list by people not
familiar with what's available.  Individual groups, such as Machar
(Washington, D.C.) and ours, and others, have also developed material and
ideas that we're happy to share.

See you in Tel Aviv?

Jane Goldhamer, Humanistic Jews of Greater Portland, OR  

goldhamr@teleport.com         ****            Beaverton, Oregon USA