Your bulletin was readdressed to "INFO" than "ALL".
Bulletins addressed to "ALL" are here here as NO
bulletin is of interest to "ALL".
Enjoy!

[Picky, picky!]



Subject: SPELLING A PERFECTION ???
HOW ABOUT PUTTING A LID ON IT...

[Are you the lid volunteering for that job?]



WHO THE DEVIL ARE YOU, SIR, TO DECIDE WHAT IS A GOOD BULLETIN
TITLE AND WHAT ISN'T!!!!!!! Excuse me, but the last time
I checked, no one died and left you in charge!!

[Excuse me, but the Ayatollah IS dead...]



To: LOONIE@ALLUSA
IN REAL WORLD COMMUNICATIONS SMILEY FACES DON'T CUT IT.

[You're right! Stick to grumpy faces from now on.]



FOR THOSE OF YOU WHO DON'T KNOW, THERE IS A STANDARD PHONETIC ALPHABET.
THIS STANDARD SHOULD BE USED AT ALL TIMES. THERE IS NEVER A REASON TO USE
YOUR OWN MADE UP PHONETICS. THERE IS NO SUBSTITUTE. MAKING UP YOUR OWN
MAKES YOU APPEAR UNWILLING TO COOPERATE WITH THE SYSTEM OR UN-KNOWLEDGEABLE!
THERE ARE NO EXCEPTIONS TO THE ABOVE.

[Now get down and give me 100 pushups!]



Use proper construction techniques, assure you have
no shorts.  How you want to package it is up to you.

[I've tried soldering with no shorts - it can be dangerous!]


Subject: PLEASE! FIX ugly bulletins!
For those airheads with wordwrap who STILL refuse to hit the little
backwards-L-shaped button variously marked "RETURN", "ENTER", "CR",
or ???, on the right-hand (that's the one you pick your nose with)
side of your computer/terminal keyboard, please write the following
on your blackboard 1000 times:
I WILL HIT THE RETURN KEY EVERY 70 CHARACTERS REGARDLESS OF WHAT MY WORD WRAP LO
OKS LIKE BECAUSE I DON'T WANT MY TYPING TO LOOK LIKE THIS AND EVERYONE WILL KNOW
WHAT AN AIRHEAD I REALLY AM.
Get the picture?

[And I thought MY messages were offensive!!!]



My God protect me from your wrath if I've made any mistakes

[No wrath here...if it's wrath you want, there's Star Trek II...]